Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Twisted Elegance

It's like meeting the man of your dreams and then meeting his beautiful wife. -Alanis Morisette

That line is one of my favorites from the song "Ironic". I used to think that would be one of the worst things that could ever happen to me. Can you imagine being in a relationship with someone all happy and BAM here comes his wife. That would mess you up right? Well my blog today isn't about meeting your dream man's wife, thank God. However it is about finding out someone or something isn't what it appeared to be.

For example you meet someone and you think, wow what a cool person. They are attractive, they dress nice, they carry themselves well, and they seem like a great catch. Then you get this person's number you have a few conversations and decide you'd like to take it a step further. You make dinner plans, the two of you go out, and that's when you realize this person is a straight fool. You know what I call this? Twisted Elegance it's when something appears different then what it really is.
Don't get me wrong Twisted Elegance can be good too sometimes things are better then they seem but in this particular blog I'll be discussing the not so positive.

While out hanging with some friends I met a really nice guy. He was very cool, he had a sort of quite personality. His approach to me was unique. He was very polite and had a spirit that seemed to soothe me. Normally I can be sort of mean when a guy approaches me but this guy for some reason had knocked down those walls some how. So much so that I couldn't wait for him to call me, I was blowing up his phone.

Things between us went so smoothly We seemed to talk about EVERYTHING. We shared stories about our family, our friends, our careers, and our life's goals. i really liked this person. I looked forward to talking to him and spending time with him. He'd make my day. After a few months of serious dating he hit me with a huge whammy. In the middle of having a conversation about a tattoo he had he blurts out I had this tattoo before my daughter was even born...HUH?!?!? Daughter?!? To my recolation you only had a son. Him: "I never mentioned my daughter to you?" Me: That would be a negative. Him: Wow my bad. This is the part where I say it's over right...Nope I went in for more.

As months went by and I started to meet more of his friends and family I realized that a lot of the things that he had said wasn't true at all. Unknowingly they would spill the beans having me sitting there looking confused wondering if I missed something. The last straw for me was going on his facebook page and seeing that he not only lied about attending college but he lied about the city that he grew up in. This is all crazy to me, because the things he lied about are things that I would have accepted. No where in my dating clause does it say you can't have kids, you must have a degree from an accredited college or university, or have traveled the continental US.

To date I am still finding out things that he lied or has put on about. At one point I thought he lied to impress me and I was flattered. Now having the time to think it all through I realize he lied because he's not happy with himself. Think about it for a second...If he's not happy with him how could he ever be happy with me??? He wont. At least not until he realizes that he is custom made by God to be to great. I hen started thinking about how many other people are walking around masking their true identities. How many people are acting out a life style to please the masses all the while they are hurting inside.

So many of us have put on an act just not realizing that we can fool the masses but we can NEVER fool God. He has a count for every hair on out head so how can we think we are running a game on him. He know that what we put on facebook, twitter, or myspace isn't true. I'm writing to myself with the next sentence so please don't shoot me. Let's ask ourselves do we really know who we are and what God has designed us to become or are we walking through life playing a role. If you answer is the later then I think it's time you checked in on your Father, because he's got something for you that will blow your mind. WORD!


  1. Love it....That is your thoughts not the stupidness of this guy. Unfortanitly in the dating world we allways meet the representives instead of the real person. I have to only admitt that my husband and I did the same with eachother. I dated my husband for two years and only after living with hime for two months after the two years did he finally figure out that I was wearing weave...LOL. I am very thankful that we overcame all of the outer things and grew to love eachother to death. As far as the lies...I kinda understand it but then again I don't...I mean let's be honest, if we told someone all our most inner thoughts and true feelings would we or could we be in good healthy relationships (In the begining of course). I didn't tell all in the begining but just found the right time to tell certain things....but now after 17 years of friendship and 10 years of marriage there is nothing we don't know about eachother.
    Dating is a wonderful thing as long as you do it with no EXPECTATIONS. Just have fun with is what it is. If you are looking for Mr. Right, most of the time it doesn't excist...but we can bring out the best in eachother....I sure know my husband and I did....Thanks for the blog :-)

  2. OMG Mel-Jo I am just seeing this. How cute that you found your man in a such a chaotic I'm a free spirit that is proud of who I am regardless of my flaws that it's hard for me to understand the need to tell lies. Oh well! Even if Mr. Right is a myth I plan on having a ton of fun looking for Just jokes!